My wife isn’t an overly ambitious person. But one thing she enjoys doing is reading. She can spend hours with books she loves, except that she feels guilty about not doing the chores and not being ‘responsible’ enough. So to her, reading doesn’t bring much value, compared to starting a business, giving birth to children, etc.
I told her that there’s obvious value in what she loves doing over and over again. It’s just that she’s weighed it with a different scale that measures it differently. To a book author, of course there’s value in people reading books. To book sellers, too. And book collectors.
We often choose to look at the world with specific lenses, and that sometimes skews our perspective of things so much that there’s something lacking in our lives.
Because of that, we sometimes fail to evaluate the true value of something we truly enjoy doing.
The value of something is maximized when that value is best articulated by the person who enjoys it the most. If you can describe in detail why something means so much to you, that proves its real value to you. Things get hazy and gray when things can’t be described in detail, so a lot of value is lost in transition. Don’t let that happen. Find what makes you tick – make sure you know EXACTLY why.
Being able to describe in detail what something means to you helps you to know what you want in life. And this is key to unlocking a lot of possibilities and opportunities in life. Conversely, being unable to comprehend, describe, and articulate value leads to confusion, frustration, and loss.
Also, don’t let others define what you should value the most. If you enjoy doing something, and it’s the only thing you can do over and over again without any prompting, inspiration or cajoling, then there must be some obvious value you get out of it, even if you have problems admitting or seeing it.
The only catch is, of course, it shouldn’t harm others in the process.
If you liked what you read, consider subscribing.
Do you live for a paycheck? Are you stuck wondering what you ought to be doing in life? If so, why do you do it? You have every minute of every hour of every day to decide – why do you decide to live your life like that? Are you following a pattern of life that everyone else seems to be using?
If you had 1 year left to live, how would you live it? If you had 6 months left, how would you live? How about 6 days?
It’s hard to imagine, because it forces us to stop focusing on the little things in life that keep us going. Things like waking up, taking a shower, going to work, having lunch, going home, watching TV, and then going to bed.
It forces us to stop thinking about getting that house, or that new car, or getting married, or getting a new job.
The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation. – Henry David Thoreau
Maybe part of you longs for something else. Maybe you want to write that book, or sail the seven seas, or speak every language spoken by man. Maybe you want more control over your life. Maybe you want to give back to the world.
Let me offer you an alternative. There’s no cost involved, and can choose at anytime when to start and when to quit. Here’s what you need to do… ready?
Measure your success by how much value you create into the world
There’s no doubt that everyone creates value. But the value I’m talking about is value to the world – in the way the world perceives value (and often spends time, effort and money based on).
For example, people want world peace. They want to get rid of AIDS. They want free beer. And so on.
What are you doing to make these people happy?
If the answer is nothing, you have not created any value. You are part of the system that does not create any new value, but seeks to maintain itself so that the wheel of life can continue turning.
If you want to get off the wheel of life, you have to create real value. More than what you think you’re doing now. Only by creating real value does it break the vicious cycle of mediocrity and self-promotion with little results. This is because every bit of good you add to this world makes it better anywhere, for everyone.
If it sounds so good, why doesn’t everyone do it? What’s the catch? I’ll make it easy – here it is:
Don’t expect anything specific in return for creating more value
This is not to say that you will never taste the reward of your hard work. No, this is quite different. Let me explain.
95% of the world is caught up in a never-ending cycle of chasing life, otherwise known as the system. These people, as hard working as they are, do not have time to stop and smell the roses, look at the big picture, or even thank you for the value that you have created for them. So, it is OK to assume that most people are “selfish, lazy, uninformed, and impatient” (with credits to Seth Godin for the statement).
There is no way to guarantee whether or not people will give you anything in return for the value you have created. Even if they do, there’s no guarantee how much they will offer, or when. Business people will have market reports, SWOT analysis charts, and purchasing trends, but you won’t. This is a different kind of game.
The only thing that should motivate you is what you already have inside. In other words, you should create value in ways where you can keep going on without expecting anything in return.
Ask yourself what is that ONE thing in the world which you can do over and over again and not get tired of? Then ask yourself how you can generate value out of that. You’ll save a lot more time doing this than trying to figure out how to get to the top of the corporate ladder in order to achieve your goals.
We put conditions to our attempts so easily:
- I want to get a promotion, but I don’t want to look like I’m sucking up to the boss.
- I want a lot of money, but I don’t want to work like a dog.
- I want peace in the world, but I’m not willing to give too much to charity.
Forget about those things!
Focus on what you’re good at, what drives you. Find ways to create real value from your strengths and passions. Don’t try to be the best employee just because everyone’s doing it. Do it because you want to and you love to do it. Or quit and do what you should be doing.
Find people who understand the value you are creating, and work with them
It is almost impossible to keep going without some kind of authentic feedback. This is why you need to find people who can rate your work, cheer you on, and be a friend.
Not many undertake the task to create real value, and by deciding to embark on this path, you will no doubt face long streaks of loneliness, doubt, frustration, and an sense of incapacity.
At this bottoming point, you should do everything you can to stay on track and not quit. And this is where genuine relationships can help a lot.
These are not the people you see at the office, who smile at you after grabbing their hot cup of coffee… or your mother who tells you that only professionals like lawyers or doctors can ever earn a decent living… or your friends who keep asking you when you’re going to get married or have children.
No, the people you need to connect to are people like yourself – who have also decided on a unique journey to create real value that has long lasting effects for the good of mankind. Speak to anyone else, and you’re in for a beating. Why? Because people in the system don’t want people to stop the wheel of life, going round and round, after spending years trying to navigate it.
And don’t try to please everyone either. Make a stand. Choose sides. But don’t stay in the middle. Stay on the wheel, or get off completely.
What you get from creating real value
By creating real value, you break the self-perpetuating cycle of assumptions, rules, and habits that are designed to do nothing but perpetuate itself. By creating real value, you offer hope to those who seek to find answers not found within the system. By creating real value, you learn new and better ways of doing things, and become a sole recipient of bearing that wisdom – giving you a unique right to provide others the ability to do the same.
Try it, and life will never be the same again.
If you liked what you read, consider subscribing.
I just got back from another family trip, and this time it was Aceh, Indonesia.
About 4 years ago, a tsunami struck the area of Aceh, killing over 100,000 people. Development is still going on today but many people have returned to their lives by now. Aceh has received some international attention due to the tsunami, and that’s a good thing when a lot of people get by with measly salaries and are always in position for a healthy economy spurned by tourism, trade and other external factors.
Land is expensive, and the government gives little for the local industries to thrive. But still, even those who have made their fortunes do return home for the simple life – living by the seaside, serving simple meals to locals and occasional tourists, planting crops, selling snacks on motorcycles. Others will immigrate to Malaysia or move to cities like Jakarta.
It’s strange to me at first to observe some poverty level, but these people are living out their lives quite meaningfully within their own means. Some are quite happy to stay where they are, and have no intention to do anything else or be anywhere else.
It seems obvious to ask about my own condition – should I aim for the simple life and make do with less and be happy with it?
With my experiences and expectations, I do not think I could live on a beach forever. But it does mean a lot to know what I want in life. A lot of people I met in Aceh seemed to know what they wanted in life – even though it was a simple life.
Without all the social baggage of going through a big education, making a lot of money, or becoming successful and popular, the Acehnese make choices about their lives very openly and just need to make ends meet and enjoy the rest. And their friends and neighbors think and act the same way. There’s no pressure whatsoever.
This would be ideal for them if the government actually provides better infrastructure to protect the small investments the Acehnese have made into the land. I don’t think they need a lot. Good roads. Clean water. Protection from wild animals so that their crops can grow. Trade groups.
Not everyone wants to live the ‘perfect’ lives we see on television. I like this article by Penelope Trunk about her farmer friend who’s happy with life the way it is, even though it doesn’t pay very much. The important part is that he wants it that way.
Other similar posts I’ve found:
If you liked what you read, consider subscribing.
